A couple of my friends are going through horrible stuff with their husbands. =( As a friend was telling me last night about her situation (husband cheating on her) I got shivers up and down my spine. I couldn’t believe this was happening to her because she loves her husband sooo much. It’s so sad. Another friend’s husband is taking all his stress out on her and she said their relationship has not been healthy for the past month. He’s been so rude and I said she doesn’t deserve to be talked to that way. I said she can stay with me for a few days if she wants. She didn’t take me up on my offer and said “marriage is hard sometimes.” I hope it gets better soon for her.
Financially, I’m not doing well at all. I’m making just enough $$ to pay the rent and my car payment. My credit card bill is really high now so I’m worried about that. I’ve been telling myself that I’ll make more $$ once I get my LCSW (which will hopefully be in a month) and then things will get better. Also talking myself through my worse case scenario (I don’t pass the LCSW test) so I’m prepared for that…I sure am a good therapist to myself…lol =)
After working more shifts at the jail, I’m feeling better about helping those in the detention center. Last week, I talked to a guy in his late 40s who said he had such a good life until he was 36. Now, he is having constant suicidal thoughts. He talked about how he has only been out of jail for a couple of weeks this entire year. I asked what he did during those couple of weeks and he said: “I did nothing. I didn’t eat and I was just using drugs.” So I let him know then this is why he is in jail: he had no hope when he was out and he had given up so he’s back to learn he does have options once he is released.
I talked to another guy who was only 18 and he said he didn’t understand why his girlfriend lied. He said he knew his girlfriend since he was 12 or 13 and they were in the same group home. He hadn’t been sleeping and I could see the dark circles under his eyes. So young to not be sleeping well. Then I talked to a woman who was sobbing because she received a letter from her teenage son who wrote he tried committing suicide. She said she doesn’t know what she will do if her son kills himself. She also talked about how she felt no one in her jail pod liked her and she is afraid she is going to lose her “good time.” I don’t know what “good time” means (I’ll have to ask about this my next shift) but she stated over and over she doesn’t want to lose her good time.
I want to close with a quote I found one day…I sent this to one of my friend’s this morning and want to share it on here too:
“Your soul is requiring you to heal deeper, to elevate past the hurt, to transcend beyond what happened, to let go of what and who no longer serves you, to protect your energy daily, to get the lesson, to master your thoughts and emotions, to forgive yourself, to love yourself unconditionally and to honor your body temple; all in order to thrive and vibrate higher daily.” Lalah Delai